Household Rules

Fred absolutely cracks me up!

It is a well-known ritual in this Sullivan household.  If you go out and get a burger, you had better bring one home for Fred.  Or don't bother coming home at all.  That's the rule, and that's just how it is.

So tonight while out running a few errands, I finally decided to try an In & Out burger.  I have heard so much about them since I've been out here that I just couldn't put it off any longer.  I dutifully went inside and ordered two cheeseburgers and an order of fries.

When I made it home and came in through the front door, the usual frenzied greeting began, and abruptly changed as soon as Fred caught a whiff of what was in my hand.  It's as if he suddenly sniffed and declared, "Why, that bag has food in it!  I smell cheeseburgers!  MY FAVORITE!"

After giving Fred a suitable greeting, I deposited my take-out bag on the stove and proceeded back out to my car to haul in my purchases.  After my second trip into the garage to drop off cat supplies, Fred let his discontent be known in a very verbal manner.  I could hear him through the garage/kitchen door declaring, "Hey you!  Out there!  I don't know what you're thinking, BUT THERE'S BURGERS IN HERE!!  THEY'RE NOT GOING TO EAT THEMSELVES, YOU KNOW!!"

Upon returning to the kitchen, my purchases safely nestled on the couch, I began to "dig in" to the bag of goodies on the stove.  (I love the fact that we can leave food unattended around our dog without worry...even if said food is a cheeseburger!)  I pulled out our cheeseburgers and unwrapped them both.  You see, I know not to give Fred his burger all at once.  You have to tear it into chunks and feed them to him one at a time...preferably while you're eating yours.  If you feed him his first, then you're stuck with him staring at your burger while you're trying to eat.  It makes you feel very guilty.  He's very good at that.

My feeble attempt to stave him off with an offering of fries was met with a stare and an airsniff directed towards the bag on the stove.  He was saying, "What is this?!?  I don't want THIS!!  There's MEAT in that bag...fork it over, lady!!" 

Well, apparently I wasn't moving fast enough for Mister Fred.  He let loose with his "howl of discontent" that lasts a full seven seconds.  "Arrrwrrroooo..rrrrroooooo...rrrrrooooo...rrrrroooooo!"  translates roughly into, "C'mon....what's taking so long?!?  I'm not getting any younger over here!!!"

So after we've both eaten our burgers, and I move towards the back of the house, he picks up the first stuffed animal that crosses his path and gallops across the living room, down the hall and into the office ahead of me.  Such joy eminating from his being, and all over a little cheeseburger in a bag.

And that's why we have the rule.

I swear I love this dog.