He Came Home

After eight months and 14 days of waiting, worrying and wondering…my Hubby is finally home.

Separation seems to be constantly in our stars. In seven and a half years of marriage, how much of that time have we really been together? Well, right away, I can tick off just over two full years of separation…and then add in the fact that before we moved in together we only saw each other on weekends…plus almost a full year of total separation before we even got married…surely you can do the math there…

This was his second trip to the sandbox. He was gone from February of 2004 to February of 2005 (49 weeks total), and again from November of 2006 to July of 2007. That's right…he was home for almost exactly 20 months before going again.

I manage to keep things together pretty well when he's gone. Our very scattered life together has trained me well for that.

It didn't start off so easy - in 1999, when he broke the news to me that his employer was going to be sending him away to another state to work for an indefinite period of time, it broke my heart. We were at Disney World...The Happiest Place on Earth…and I would just spontaneously burst into tears. It totally baffled our waiter at breakfast one morning…poor guy. All he wanted to know was what I wanted for breakfast, and the next thing he knows I'm in a puddle of tears in the restaurant of the Wilderness Lodge.

Our next long-term separation was when Hubby joined the Army. He went away to basic training and then to school to learn his job. By the time I joined him in Alabama I was getting used to the separation, but it wasn't any easier. Added to that was the fact that I had uprooted from my friends and family and moved to this alien landscape.

A shorter, yet just as heart-wrenching, separation happened when he went overseas without me. I should have been with him, but thanks to the idiocy of a woman in Alabama, I was not. It took some finagling, and a well worded email to a person in the chain of command, but after a very short separation we were back together again.

And as luck would have it, from February of 2001 until February of 2004, our separations would be minimal. A month here, a month there. Mere drops in the bucket compared to what we had been through in the past.

And then the Orders came down the pipe. My Husband would be headed off to a war zone. I managed to keep it together for this news. We worked as a team to prepare for his departure. Some things got taken care of around the house, and in a whirlwind of activity the time came for him to leave. I handled the good-bye really well…until I was walking back to my car in the snowy and icy parking lot and the buses of soldiers drove by on their way to the airport. That's when it hit me…with a groan I realized that there was a very real chance that I may never see my Hubby alive again. As we all rushed to the side of the street to wave goodbye to these brave heroes, I'm sure that all the other spouses around me felt the same knot in their hearts. What if???

Overall, I handled that separation very well. I was sick for an entire week when I realized that Hubby was convoying from Kuwait to his duty station in Iraq. When the calls stopped coming, I knew what was happening…no one had to tell me. It wasn't until I got my next call from him, letting me know that he arrived safely, that I was OK again.

The months ticked by and I kept myself busy with work, travel and friends. And then he came home to me…safe and sound. Alive and well. I was so grateful.

Now we have survived another separation…very similar to the last one, yet somehow so different. He is home again, and I am again thankful to have him here with me…for however long it lasts.

These separations…especially the ones where he leaves to go off to a war zone and I can never be one hundred percent sure that he'll be coming back to me…they've changed me somehow. When I see footage or read articles about families saying goodbye to their loved ones, or greeting them after a long separation…or when I see footage and memorials of those that weren't lucky enough to make it back to their loved ones…or even when I hear a particularly poignant song on the radio…my heart wrenches and I have to pull myself together. I can feel my eyes start welling up and I have to fight back the emotions that want to burst forth.

I can very much relate to all of the people in those situations. I've bravely said goodbye and I love you to the man that I plan to spend the rest of my life with…holding myself together while he marches off to a foreign land and not knowing for sure that I'll see or hear him again. The thought tries to come forward…"What would I do without him…noreally without him…what if he doesn't come back?" But I fight that cloud…stubbornly telling myself that he'll be home again. But at the same time, I am more vulnerable because of it…I have to fight the creeping darkness until he returns and brings the light with him that will banish the dark thoughts again.

I have grown in strength because of these separations. Now he is home again and we can settle back into our familiar patterns. There is no cloud of impending separation looming over us for now. We can bask in the glow of being reunited, and as that glow fades with time we will find ourselves moving on with life and enjoying our time together.

We have to enjoy our time together…because we refuse to delude ourselves into thinking that the separation won't happen again. Oh, what a pleasant surprise it would be if it never happened again! But if it does, we will charge ahead fully prepared to meet the challenges…and I will again fight the dark clouds of negativity that insist on creeping into my mind.

Eight Months Gone

Today marks eight months since Hubby officially left home on his journey to the sandbox. What has happened and changed over the past month?

- Number of meals cooked this month: 0 
   Running total for deployment: 0
   (Note that I do not count frozen pizzas, chicken nuggets or baking a hamburger in the oven as cooking.)

- Special Note: While I DID make baked beans for a day out on the lake…they are not a full meal, therefore they do not rank in the meal-counter.

- Scrapalooza…seems to be at a rest. I didn't scrap any pages this month. I just didn't seem to have the motivation this time around…

- Mechanical Emergency Number Five: My computer crashed. It just up-and-decided not to start on me one day. After I emailed Hubby to let him know that my internet access would be very limited until he returns home to fix the computer, he rode in to the rescue with a new laptop. Totally unexpected! Now I just hope that he is able to get the old computer up and running long enough to pull all of my stuff off of it…

- What, oh what have I done to deserve the tormenting of the Automotive Gods? As I was driving on the freeway one day, a rock popped up out of nowhere and dinged my windshield. Now I have a little asterisk just of the left of my field of vision in the windshield. Dammit! AND THEN, I was walking Sadie Marie one day and happened to see a little "glint" from one of my tires. I had driven over a screw! Turns out that the Automotive Gods were just toying with my emotions that time…it just stuck itself in the tread and didn't actually penetrate the tire. I really don't want to dump any more money into this car…I just want to sell it and have my Jeep already!!

- I've finally given in and decided to follow through on a promise I made to myself at the beginning of the year, when I started my new job. With the addition of more money to the check, I told myself that I was going to splurge and get myself a fresh pedicure every pay period. Until this month, I hadn't followed through. I finally did, and am in love with the pedicure again! I'm definitely keeping up with this…now if I can only make myself immune to my hatred of the nail file…

- Reports from the Front...summer has brought back two of our college-bound employees. They're in town for the summer, bringing some much needed relief to the office. We've also got a "newbie" on board, so the staffing situation seems to be temporarily resolved…for the time being. The major oddities this month are the capture of a goose and two adorable baby gray foxes. All went to the local wildlife rescue, which was wonderful. And if you think that snakes can't come up your plumbing and through your toilet, guess what. They can! We had a 4-5' constrictor come up into a toilet in the city this month…I never thought those stories were real! But we went and picked up the proof!!

Nostalgia

I just received a batch of photos from some friends that took a gorgeous, scenic drive through the back roads of Nevada with the local Z car club.  Such gorgeous photos!  Genuinely made me wish that Mike and I had been able to go.

It got me in a bit of a nastalgic mood...so I thought I would post my e-mail summary of a similar trip that we were privileged to go on last October...

Mike and I decided to take advantage of the continuous delays of his impending departure to the giant sandbox this past weekend to sign up for a great trip through his Z Car Club. We had heard about the Z Run to Death Valley back in June, and had our name on the list to go from the start. Then we found out that he would be leaving, so we cancelled our plans. Fortunately, the constant delays of his departure allowed us to take part in the trip after all!

It was a bit of a whirlwind decision…Mike made the phone call to the trip's organizers on Wednesday, we boarded Fred in a local kennel and left on Thursday! We spent Thursday night in Manteca, CA and met up with the drivers on Friday morning to begin the trip. There were 11 Zs participating in the drive. We crossed the Sierra Mountains early in the day on Thursday using the Sonora Pass. This pass is north of the Tioga Pass that we explored a couple of weeks ago. The scenery was just as stunning, although not as rugged as what we found in the John Muir and Ansel Adams Wildernesses. We couldn't have asked for more beautiful weather – the sky was a gorgeous blue scattered with silky white clouds. We even got to see some snow on the way!

Lunch brought us to the town of Lee Vining, and an after-lunch stop at Mono Lake. Mike and I visited this lake briefly a few weeks ago, but did not drive on any of the roads around the lake at that time. We missed out! The Z run cut off of the main highway, and into the Mono Scenic Basin. We stopped to check out the Mono Craters, formed by volcanic activity, and got some great pictures of the lake and distant scenery. From this area, we began entering the more arid areas of the valley that runs between the Sierras and the White Mountains. The road was long and hilly – perfect driving conditions for this group!

We rolled into the town of Bishop for the evening, just in time to miss driving in the huge rain storm that we observed dumping snow on the surrounding mountains! The storm blew through overnight (lots of wind!!), and was still lingering in the early morning when we met in the parking lot to begin the next leg of the journey. In a strange twist of luck, one of our drivers had run over a screw and had a flat tire! I don't know what was funnier…the fact that 4 people were trying to help get the tire fixed, or the fact that they all brought their own gloves on the trip! So this delayed our departure by a couple of hours, which worked in our favor…

Once we were on our way, we took a small diversion off of the main road to check out the Bristlecone Pine Forest…something that isn't in our tour book and not on any of our maps…so Mike and I never knew about it! This forest is the home to the world's oldest trees – and they grow in the worst possible conditions! Nothing else can grow in the dolomite that these trees have rooted themselves in. Mike and I will definitely go back to check out the actual forest and trees in better weather. The previous night's storms had blown in some snow into this area, and we drove as far up into the park as we dared…once we started hitting slush on the road, we all turned around and drove down to the lowest scenic view…which was amazing! This view offered a panorama of the valley below – and awesome views of the neighboring mountains and the weather blowing through. Had we left a couple of hours earlier, we never would have been able to make it as far up the mountain as we did, and the weather wouldn't have been cleared up yet. So a big thank you to Dustin and Makayla (sp?) for sacrificing their tire. J

The trip continued on through an arid valley with very little in sight…just a couple of ranches. We meandered our way into Nevada and passed by an apparently well-known brothel. Of course, we had to stop and take advantage of this photo opportunity! On through Nevada, we entered Death Valley and drove to Scotty's Castle. Everyone took advantage of the opportunity to get out and walk around – some signing up for tours of the castle and others just wandering around the grounds. It was at this point that we were supposed to meet up with about 15 other Z cars from another Z club…but the main road leading through the valley was closed due to the previous night's weather! While we were not all looking forward to adding about 50 miles to our trip by having to drive back into Nevada and enter the park again at a different location to get to our night's lodgings, we really had nothing to worry about. Our "Buzzard Luck" struck again when Steve locked his key in his car and had to call AAA for a rescue. About two hours later, when we were finally deciding to resort to our own methods of unlocking the door to the Mach 5 (with a modified bucket handle, no less!), the AAA guy showed up to a round of applause. After just a few minutes, the car was open, and so was the road! Another unexpected delay worked in our favor, as we could now drive through the valley and check out some more sights.

We stopped at Ubehebe Crater, and thanks to our most fortunate "unluckiness", we had awesome lighting as the sun began its descent past the mountains for the evening. Just goes to show that what might appear as an unfortunate event can often work in your favor! We rounded out the night with a fabulous group dinner at the steak house and a dip in the mineral springs-fed pool.

Sunday saw a morning with no delays – we drove up to Dante's View and Zabriskie Point to check out some amazing panoramas of the valley. Mike and I were very satisfied with this visit to the park, as we saw some things that we didn't see on our last trip through the valley. After a final stop at the hotel for breakfast, we were on our way out of the valley and to our final stop – Ridgecrest for lunch. Mike and I had made this drive before – in rain and fog at night– so we took advantage of being able to enjoy the scenery this time.

After lunch, it was back towards the Sierras and the road home. We passed back through my favorite patch of Joshua Trees that we saw back in January. Upon reaching Lake Isabella nestled in the Sierras, we branched off from the rest of the group and headed home.

Mike and I had a wonderful trip, and hope you enjoy the pictures. There are a lot of them, and be warned that you'll see a lot of pics of cars…but after all, that's what this trip was all about!

Here are the pictures from Friday:

http://share.shutterfly.com/action/welcome?sid=8AaMWjduzcs1Fy8

Here are the pictures from Saturday:

http://share.shutterfly.com/action/welcome?sid=8AaMWjduzcs1Fz4

Here are the pictures from Sunday:

http://share.shutterfly.com/action/welcome?sid=8AaMWjduzcs1F0k&notag=1

A Glimpse Into The Window

I've started watching a new program on TV. It's called "Army Wives," and it offers me a little flashback into my previous life. It's like if the "Desperate Housewives" had married soldiers…only without all the sex in the storyline.

I'm only two episodes into this series, and I'm pretty impressed. It seems to offer a pretty insightful look into the lives of military spouses. Oh, sure…some of it is a bit dramatized. But you know, I look and see flashes of truth.

There's the two most prominent versions of the "officer's wife." One is the wife that really reaches out to all the spouses, no matter what the rank of their soldier. Claudia Joy is the model of some of the more delightful officer-wives that I met in my experience with the military. She doesn't try to wear her husband's rank, or demand respect because of it. She is warm and genuine and real.

The other officer's wife that they've featured in the storyline so far is the polar opposite. She is snide, condescending and catty. I've seen those wives, too…all too many times.

There's the couple that are struggling financially. I think most lower-enlisted families have been there at some point. Just scraping by and trying to survive and keep the family afloat. This couple (Pamela and her husband) is doing some pretty amazing things to get by, and I'm interested to see where their story goes.

I see the gossips weaving through the scenes. Every base has them…the spouses that just can't mind their own business, and have to gab about other people's affairs. In the first few minutes of the first episode, rumors were flying - and I saw the parallels to real life there, too.

I relate most to the newly married couple. PFC Troy LeBlanc and his wife, Roxy. It takes me back to when Hubby first joined the army. He had five full months to fully immerse himself in the army culture and learn the ins and outs. I came in clueless. Struggling to learn what all those silly acronyms meant, the new "rules" governing our lives. It was hard, and I see Roxy struggling to fit in and adjust, just as I did.

So far, I really like what I see in this show. I can relate. When Roxy found out that her husband is due to ship out to Iraq in a matter of days, my heart sank with hers. I know what it feels like to go through that experience, and it tears my heart out every time. Such experiences have changed me so…I get all emotional and tear up anytime I see something on TV that shows a family being separated or reunited because of the duties of war.

I rejoiced with the Lt. Colonel and her husband when she returned from two years in Afghanistan, because I know what that experience is like, too. Coming together with the person that you love most, the person that you desire to be with no matter what…and then having to experience the unfamiliar as you learn about each other all over again. I watch their reintegration experience with keen interest…thankful that Hubby and I have not had such trying experiences. Praying that we never will.

I've noticed that this show seems to really try to focus on the truths of military life. The housing that the lower-enlisted are living in are almost mirrors of where Hubby and I lived in Alabama. We referred to our little duplex as the "crack house" with good reason. It was by no means luxurious, but it was shelter and it was free, and we were thankful. I see the houses that the officers and their families are in and reflect that yes, this seems to be true to life as well.

I want this show to reflect the closeness of military life. How people run into each other at many different duty stations throughout their military life. How the base operates as its own little city…you see all these people every day…you live together, you work together, your kids all go to the same school and daycare, you all shop at the same places. You run into each other at the bank, the gas station, the store, the library. There is no getting away, and that can swing either for the good or the bad.

I hope that this show stays the course and does well. It seems that so many shows fail to make it past the first few episodes anymore. I'm almost afraid to become a devotee to any show because of the fickleness of the industry. But I see that this show has potential. With a bit of time and seasoning, I think that it may offer a peek into the trials and tribulations of the military lifestyle…something that the average person most likely will never get a taste of any other way. It is a unique experience…full of personal little successes and failures. I hope this show is that window…letting other people see what it is like inside the cultured existence that is military life.

Seven Months Gone

Today marks seven months since Hubby officially left home on his journey to the sandbox. What has happened and changed over the past month?

- Number of meals cooked this month: 0 
  Running total for deployment: 0
(Note that I do not count frozen pizzas, chicken nuggets or baking a hamburger in the oven as cooking.)

- EEP!! Only about two more months until Hubby returns!! That's so exciting!! I've noticed a pattern whenever he leaves for a long time. The first few months of separation fly by so fast, the next few drag along and are pretty difficult, and the final three or so are full of excitement and anticipation about his return. I've finally entered the excitement and anticipation stage - I can't wait for him to come back home!!

- Scrapalooza saw the completion of 31 pages. I'm still trapped in 2004, and need to find my way to our departure from Europe in October of 2005 before the Hubby gets back if I'm going to meet my goal. I'd better get my ass in gear and start scrapping hardcore again!

- Sweet Sadie has graduated to being able to sleep in the bed with me at night. There are no destructive messes in the house, and she has finally learned the schedule! It is so comforting to have her body curled up next to mine in the bed. Just the presence of another being in the bed is nice these days. Of course, Fred always has to "one better" Sadie. Since she now has a place in the bed, he has started sleeping on his Daddy's pillows! They truly are silly pups - and they love each other's company so much!

- For the record, the Black Beast (Hubby's car) seems to be falling apart while on my watch, and I am totally not amused. In addition to the leaky power steering fluid, causing the Hicas light to keep coming on…now the antenna won't work properly. Garr! It's not my fault, I swear! And I'm concentrating on keeping my Granny Mobile in good running order long enough to sell it later this year…in order to herald in the Era of the Heep!!

- No additions to the garden this month. I'm concentrating on maintaining my army of plants and trying to keep as much alive as I can in the face of the impending heat wave that we call Summer here in the Central Valley. I fear that most of my container garden will perish in the intense heat of the summer. I'm intensely hoping to have some sort of cover in place over our west-facing patio by this time next year…maybe I'll have better luck then.

- Reports from the Front...Stress level - pretty high. Work is keeping me going full steam ahead. We're totally slammed these days, with barely enough staff to keep going. I'm hanging in there…there is a small skeleton crew keeping things afloat until who knows when. It's bringing us all closer together, though…and that is a huge positive. We've instituted an awesome new coping mechanism…Mad Libs! OMG - they're so funny! We all look forward to the designated Mad Lib time of the day. We find ourselves literally rolling on the floor in laughter - which is a good thing. We all need something funny to look forward to every day, and this seems to fit the bill. I got bitten this month - by a little POS dog - my hand didn't turn blue or fall off, so I guess I'll live. And no bull…well, okay…maybe a little bull. We had a bull running in the city this month! It was quite the story - made for a very interesting week when it happened.J And speaking of the week of the bull, during the very same week we also brought in a ferret (illegal in Cali - who knew?…well, apparently the cop that pulled over the car that had said ferret as a passenger knew…), a giant iguana, a python sighting and the turn over of a family of hamsters. We have quite the menagerie!

The Ballad Of The Bull

Our bull finally has a home! I just happened to be available to go with Boss Lady to meet the Cattle Men that are taking Ponson to his new home.

Through the Animal Services grapevine, Boss Lady was able to track down some Cattle Men that were willing to drive down from another county and load Ponson up and take him away to join their herd.

Boss Lady and I met up with the Cattle Men this evening at the rodeo grounds and got to see the action take place. The Cattle Men backed up their trailer, got the runs between the pens blocked off so that Ponsen had nowhere to go except into the trailer, and with minimal problems got him loaded up!

The whole process took less than ten minutes…it's amazing how quickly it works when you actually deal with cattle for a living. Cattle Men used a little batch of hay to lure Ponson towards the trailer. Ponson started to go for it, then decided he didn't like the idea of climbing up into another trailer so quickly. So he trotted around the run for a couple of minutes…checking out the horses and just bucking around. Then the Cattle Men got out a couple of long sticks to help prod him in the right direction…then with some shouts of "Hup!! Hup!!" Ponson was up in the trailer and shooed to the front. He was locked into place and given some hay, and then he was off to a better place.

Hooray for Ponson!!

Ponson checking out all this new activity

Loaded up, secured and ready to go!

Happy trails to you!!

Rollin' Rollin' Rollin'

Today was another seemingly unassuming day at the office…

…or so it seemed.

I started the day thankful that I had gone in on Sunday and put in a few hours. I was able to get some of the tedious Monday morning tasks out of the way. Logging the weekend's dispatch calls, calculating and balancing the weekend's monetary intake, logging licenses sold. These are things that usually pile up on me first thing Monday morning…while I'm trying to stay afloat through the influx of phone calls, bark complaints and miscellaneous crap that flies our way first thing in the week.

This morning, I worked on organizing personnel files and correcting some paperwork. We were all in a jolly mood - laughing and joking as only our crew can. We were plugging through our morning and getting caught up.

And then it was ten o'clock.

Supervisor had gone off in the Mack Daddy to deliver some animals to one of our veterinarian offices for surgeries. Boss Lady and I were reveling in the fresh reorganization of her office that we completed over the weekend. Field-Officer-In-Training (FOIT) had declared today to be an organizational day for herself, and was diligently working on organizing her work bag and inventorying our excess uniform bits and bobs. The police radio was chirping away in the background…senseless babble that we keep turned on so that we have the appearance that we keep up with what is going on in the city. Meanwhile, in the shelter, Livestock Officer (dubbed as such because she's in school to become a large-animal vet) and our janitorial staff were seeing to the animals and taking care of the building.

I was chatting and joking with the Boss Lady, and was walking through the office when I was stopped cold in my tracks. I wasn't sure I had heard what I thought I just heard coming across the police radio…could it be? Were my ears playing tricks on me? It was one of those moments when I wished that I had TiVo for the radio…just back it up a bit and listen again.

I stopped and looked at FOIT and asked her, "Did I just hear that right? Did they say 'bull?'" Both FOIT and Boss Lady stopped and asked me, "What?"

"I think I just heard them (Dispatch) talking about a bull…"

Sure enough, the phone rings. While FOIT and Boss Lady are experiencing a new state of baffledness (we're all baffled at one time or another in our department), I answered the phone. At least this time M in dispatch let me get through my introductory spiel before he started talking. And when he identified himself, it was in a fit of laughter. To which I replied, "M…did I just hear you guys right? There's a bull loose?"

Yes, he assured me…there is a bull loose at the intersection of X and Y streets.

Innnteresting.

I confirm verbally to Boss Lady and FOIT that yes, indeed there is a bull loose in the city. Boss Lady is in denial - "It's a prank call…it's gotta be," she declared. M must have heard her because he said, "No…I've gotten a lot of calls on it…it's there." As I furiously scribble notes on my notepad, Boss Lady gets on her cell phone and dials up Livestock Officer.

"Get over here and get your ropin' boots on," she yells, "We've got a bull loose in the city!"

Understandably, this must have come as a surprise to Livestock Officer, because Boss Lady had to repeat herself.

As I'm writing up the call on our official log, I look at Boss Lady and I can see the wheels spinning. She's thinking to herself, "What the hell are we going to do with a bull?" She scurries to the key hooks and starts inventorying the vehicles we have on site. Mack Daddy is gone, leaving us with the van and the little truck. Hmm.

Meanwhile, Livestock Officer comes blowing into the building to pull on her uniform top and duty belt. The first words out of her mouth are, "Finally!! I get to rope something!!"

As she rushes to get her gear on, Boss Lady and I shout to let her know where to meet us, and we're out the door, FOIT in tow. Boss Lady and I jump into the van, while FOIT hops into her own truck. She's coming along to observe, but can't stay because she has an appointment to get to.

Boss Lady and I take flight out of the parking lot (almost literally - there's a HUGE dip in the parking lot that you can go airborne over if you're not careful), and as we pull out to the end of the driveway and turn onto the main road, I decide to call Supervisor.

"You must not be listening to your radio," I tell her, "because if you were, I would have heard from you by now."

"Uh oh," she responds, "what's going on now."

"There's a bull loose," I tell her, knowing what is coming next.

"A what?!?"

Turns out that Supervisor has just exited the freeway and is mere minutes behind us. We let her know where to meet us and we're on our way.

As we cross the main thoroughfare through the city and approach the next stop, Boss Lady asks me which direction we're headed at the intersection. Like I know…I have no clue how to navigate this city! Fortunately, the large crowd just east of the intersection offers us a huge indication of where we should be.

And sure enough, there is our bull…tethered to a tree.

The fire department apparently received an emergency call…it seems that in all the kerfuffle of having a bullwandering the streets just one block south of the city's main thoroughfare, citizens decided to try to get involved.

Did they think that the bull was cute and cuddly? Heeeere, bully, bully. A citizen's arrest, maybe??

By the time we arrived on scene, the fire department had managed to rope the bull and had him secured to a huge tree in someone's front yard. They were still in the process of securing the ropes when Boss Lady and I pulled in.

"Livestock Officer is going to be disappointed," I comment, "She didn't get to rope herself a bull."

And then, I've never seen someone take action quite like this…Boss Lady is right there in the thick of things. Finding out the whos, whats, whens, wheres and whys of it all. A couple of police officers were on scene. (One declared, "I grew up in the city of Compton…we aint' got to worry about things like this there!") The public is standing by. Livestock Officer is barreling out of the little truck with her lasso ready to go. Supervisor pulls up in the Mack Daddy and takes the entire scene in.

Meanwhile, Boss Lady is already on the phone…figuring out how we're going to get this bloody bull transported to someplace that we can store it.

Right. Somehow, I don't think that our chain link fence back at the shelter is going to manage to contain this one…

After a few minutes on scene to find our footing…when everyone and their mother has to come by and offer their take on events, the fire fighters are taking their pictures with the bull, some older man in a denim shirt is relaying a story about how a little old lady thought she could step out of her car and coax the bull her way - only to have second thoughts when it started to charge her, some incredibly sort and sweaty man is going on and on about making sure that he gets his rope back (I think he was the first one to get a rope around the bull's horns), a topless man in incredibly loose-fitting sweat pants (surely those things were a municipal code violation in themselves!) and long greasy gray hair is wandering around the scene offering tidbits of information, and people are just walking up to the thing thinking that a petting zoo has sprung up in the middle of the city...Boss Lady has finally organized a game planand managed to pull transportation for the bull out of her ass. We'll use the mounted patrol's truck and trailer to haul the beast out to the rodeo grounds and store it in a pen there.

So Livestock Officer and I take off in the little truck and head to the police department to pick up the truck and trailer. It takes awhile to track down the keys, get the truck and make sure the trailer is still hooked up and ready to go. But we eventually get everything sorted out and are back on scene before too much time has elapsed.

Pulling back up to the scene behind the wheel of the little truck, I am amazed at the sight before me. There is Adoption Center Employee (ACE), on scene and helping with the bull. And it's her day off! It's like de ja vu!!  I whip the little truck into a parking spot and cross the street, declaring, "Well, look who it is! The Adoption Center Employee!!"

I quickly follow up with, "You know, that thing isn't going to be adoptable."

She just laughed. Apparently, she had been across town, unwittingly running personal errands when her phone rang. It was Supervisor declaring, "Guess what I'm doing, guess what I'm doing!!" Having been informed of the morning's events, ACE dropped her morning itinerary and sped across town to either help, or watch the freak show unfold.

After a few minutes of organizing ourselves and getting our gear into place, Livestock Officer has managed to whip up a makeshift halter out of the sweaty wee-man's rope. Like she's a master of origami or something. The owner of the bull has turned up and is now under a barrage of questions. Is it halter trained? No, but I ride it sometimes.

What??

It takes ACE, Livestock Officer, Bull Owner and Boss Lady to get the silly bull moving. At this point, you can tell that Supervisor and I obviously have little to no livestock experience. We're just standing back and watching…supervisor making sure that everyone is moving together, and me with a camera snapping photos.

Yes, I've declared myself to be the official Animal Services Archivist.

The wrangler team manages to get the bull lead over to the waiting trailer. Everyone positions themselves and gets ready, and then they're coaxing the bull into the trailer. He's not too thrilled about this…apparently he's not too keen on going for a little drive. Livestock Officer is up in the trailer pulling the halter and calls down to the Bull Owner to twist the bull's tail. She later explained that if you want to get a bull to move, twisting its tail is the key. Apparently, that is also a surefire way to get a bull to take a massive shit all over the place, because that is what happened. Fortunately, Bull Owner was closest in proximity to the landing zone…

With the bull finally in the trailer and tied down to ensure that he won't go anywhere, we begin the tedious process of getting ready to go. But there is a small glitch in the plan…in the process of getting the bull up into the trailer, he tore off half of the rubber bumper. Livestock Officer is having a fit…she spent a good five minutes repairing this bumper before we even took the truck out of the police department.

Boss Lady is now in her prime operating mode. She takes one look at the bumper half resting on the street and asks for someone to go get a slip-lead. Yes…in the world of Animal Services, the slip lead is just as valuable as duct tape.There isn't anything that we can't create or secure with a hefty supply of these little nylon leashes. A little bit of wrapping, pulling and knot tying sees the bumper now securely attached to the trailer.

Amazing.

So in the blink of an eye, we've formed a caravan of animal services vehicles to escort our guest of honor across the city. Boss Lady takes the lead in the van, followed by Livestock Officer and the bull in the mounted patrol truck and trailer, ACE in her own SUV, Supervisor in the Mack Daddy and me in the little truck. We wind our way through the city, an honor guard of sorts.

In the police truck with the radio going, I hear Boss Lady log on and inform Dispatch to show Animal Services enroute to the rodeo grounds. Unable to skip a beat, I'm on my cell phone to Supervisor quipping, "And by 'show Animal Services enroute to the rodeo grounds'…she means all of us!"

It doesn't take long to get to our destination. We line up all the vehicles and locate the pens - and graciously find an empty one right up front. While Livestock Officer is backing the truck and trailer up to the pens, the rest of us are forming a game plan. I'm to brace one of the gates…with the intent of not letting the bull push through the gate and wind up in the wrong area. Supervisor is to use her body to block the gap to the left of the trailer, so that the bull cannot escape. The goal is to coax the bull off of the trailer and into the pen without incident.

Right. Like if there's any indication that the bull is going to veer off course and head in the direction of either of us, Supervisor and I aren't going to dive out of the way. We might be crazy, but we're not stupid.

Fortunately, the bull comes off the trailer with just a bit of coaxing, and no real fighting. Granted, Livestock Officer was pulling with all her might, and Boss Lady and ACE were behind pushing for all that they were worth…but it could have been worse. In a few minutes, he's in a pen and ACE, Boss Lady and Livestock Officer have removed the ropes that bound him.

The fire department arrives to reclaim their rope, and I am tasked with returning the other rope to the wee man that loaned it to us.

When I show up at his house to hand over his rope to him, he appears to have lost his shirt. eeewww!!

We all return back to our mundane existence, out in the Animal Services compound.  With the added bonus of throwing bull jokes around for the rest of the day.

Once again, all is right with the world.

We later found out that the entire police department had their radios tuned in and turned up…following the progress of our saga from start to finish. So happy that we could all provide a little bit of entertainment in their day.

In a weird twist of fate, I was wearing the same sandals that I had on when I went on my dog-chasing excursion. They're my favorite pair, but I'm beginning to think that they're cursed.

And this time we had one officer in complete uniform.

At least I got my morning cup of coffee.

Move 'em on, head 'em up 
Head 'em up, move 'em on 
Move 'em on, head 'em up 
Rawhide 
Count 'em out, ride 'em in, 
Ride 'em in, count 'em out, 
Count 'em out, ride 'em in 
Rawhide!